A few weeks ago, having been gone for seven months, I took a flight back to the States. As the airplane flew over Los Angeles, nostalgia swirled inside my head. I first traveled to this City when I was a teenager from Ohio, ready to live with my aunt and attend college.

Never could I have imagined years and years later, creating a home in a foreign country. While the plane taxied to its gate, familiar memories of maneuvering the city’s freeways, neighborhood streets, and frequenting trendy locations, resonated. I smiled when listening to the Europeans on the flight, eager to explore a city I knew I wouldn’t live in again, because I no longer belonged.

Belonging is a critical part of life. Finding its door brings contentment even while embracing the ups and downs, and the good and bad choices… it all leads to understanding yourself. My journey has been one of opening many doors. I’ve lived in all three western states—California, Oregon, and Washington—for employment opportunities, pivotal to the later lifestyle I’ve carved out in Europe.

Reaching the end corridor of the Los Angeles U.S. Customs, I was directed into the U.S.A. Citizen Passport Area. I readied, for the country’s entry, my blue passport with its decent self-photograph. I was happy to hold this document—it meant I was in a shorter line, but also, I was HOME.

Funny, living in Europe, one loses the perspective of what home is across the globe. Your daily life phases more and more away from America. Most, if not all the expats I’ve met, vow NEVER to stand in a U.S. Custom’s line again. They’re done with the politics, racism, violence, and high cost of living. Home is now a country with language challenges.

Retuning to handle personal matters has given me an appreciation in seeing family and friends face-to-face. Relationships, the ones I have here, mean more to me than I thought. I’ve missed them.

I’m still asked why I ventured into an uncharted territory. Originally, Portugal’s purchase was an intended Airbnb investment. But things changed; choice tourist destinations clamped down on such type of rentals. Thus, this endeavor became a serious consideration for a second home and obtaining a second passport.

Summarizing the details of achieving this goal are:

• Resident Visa: Easily obtained.
• Climate: Moderate Mediterranean with mild winters.
• National Health Insurance, not welfare: FREE. Private Health insurance is affordable at a cost €40 per month, and prescriptions are free or at a very, very low cost.
• Transportation: Finding no need for a car in a walkable city, also UBER, LYFT, and BOLT are cheap. Bus stops and metro trains are a short distance from my front door.
• Safety: The country ranked #6 in the world for safety. It’s not an issue to walk around alone after dark here. Coming from the U.S., (ranked 129th in safety); Canada (ranked #12).
• Location: Three International Airports take you anywhere in Europe for a small, and I mean small price.

People. The Portuguese people speak ENGLISH, the Americans aren’t uptight and stressed. It seems the political divide wasn’t packed in their luggage.

Yet, in all my celebrations rejoining family and friends, I struggle with the time back here. How and why can’t the country I was born in, rise above its chaos occupying the newspapers, social and news media? I worry how low can the bar drop, and why can’t there be more cohesiveness within the world’s oldest representative democracy? Giving up my passport isn’t an option—I’ve earned the right to obtain one. Maybe in the future, I’ll have less and less desire to return if the bar hits rock bottom.